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2008 February | Ted's Game

Monthly Archive for February, 2008

Wedding of the year in pictures

Published
by
Ted
on February 28, 2008
in People
. 19 Comments Tags: , .

Love is such a wonderful thing and when it strikes you, you need to follow. Like these people. I hope they won’t have any children though.

First let’s take a look at the groom’s wonderful party, in front of the lovely garage door. Yes, the groom is the one standing out as the best dressed. That’s right. The red shirt.

Funny wedding picture 1

Next, the lovely bridesmaids and the happy blushing bride, I’ll tell you, that vibrant red is not for anyone, but this group seems to pull if off graciously.

Bridesmaids in red funny

And of course, the lovely couple, you can almost smell the love in the air. Congratulations.

lovely couple funny

lovely couple funny 2

lovely couple funny 3

lovely couple funny 4

lovely couple funny 6

The freedom to pee standing up

Published
by
Ted
on February 13, 2008
in People
. 11 Comments Tags: , , , , .

Or how some women simply take feminism too far. This is for real. They’re not kidding.

Ok. So you’re a chick but I guess not a very happy one, because besides not being very attractive (thus hating all the men in the world, god damned pigs) , you’re also quite low under the self-esteem chapter and you secretly dream of being a man.

Well, some Dutch lady worked hard and brought you this absolutely unique solution to all your problems, in fact, the first and most important step on your way to becoming even less attractive. I mean, what makes someone a man? Being sarcastic, intelligent? Having a penis? Providing for the family? Knowing how to drive a car? Hell no. The answer is : Men pee while standing up! So that’s the fundamental difference that you’ll need to overcome and luckily enough, it’s been perfected.

Have you ever been afraid to pull down your pants to squat and pee and risk being seen or peeing on your shoes? Your solution is here ladies!

This amazing high tech engineered product brings you the features you’ve always been dreaming of: the P-Mate allows women to pee standing up; the P-Mate is the most amazing female urinary device; the P-Mate gives women the freedom to pee like men and of course, for some good fortune when you relieve yourself: the P-Mate is covered with a 4-leaf clover design as it is good luck to have one with you when you are in need. Holy cow! Does it get any better? Hell yeah, because…

It comes with very graphic instructions

Another awesome feature that’s gonna blow your panties off is that when you buy more than ten Pmates, the price drops from $4.99 to $4.50 so don’t hesitate and get your own life time supply of peeing delight. Click here to buy and here to see this wonderful invention on the original website.

And always remember the Female Freedom motto : “Don’t get caught with your pants down”. Thank you and happy peeing.

Design the BMD logo and win professional gaming gear

Published
by
Ted
on February 11, 2008
in Gaming
. 48 Comments Tags: , , , , , , , .

Enter this competition to be the official designer of the BMD-gaming team and BMD-LAN logo and win Razer and Microsoft PC gaming goodies.

1. What is BMD?

BMD stands for Bucharest Masters of DotA and it’s basically a gaming team aiming for honors and glory in the international rankings. BMD-LAN is the Local Area Network DotA competition that I organize, sponsor and promote, hoping that it would become a highlight of the Eastern European DotA calendar and that proved to be a real success at it’s first edition. (you can find details in Romanian as well as pictures, here)

2. What is this logo contest all about?

The BMD website that will be announced and promoted this March as well as the BMD-LAN competition will need a memorable and professional looking logo. I’m expecting the following : the three letters of the team’s name, something connecting it to the DotA phenomenon, a lot of originality and new ideas.

3. What can you win?

The winner of this contest will be getting the attention and the respect deserved by the person that designed the first ever BMD logo and his name will be mentioned on the website as well as on the BMD-LAN posters, as well as a link to his/her website if they have one and want to promote it. Also I promise that once we come up with a decent idea and we declare it a winner, I will keep the same logo in the same design for at least one year, no matter what other offers i get to change it. Ok, well, I was pretty much sure that wouldn’t be enough to get you going, so I’m also throwing in one of these pro gaming peripherals to chose from in case you win(click on the pictures for details):

Ok, now that we got that straightened out, let’s get to the official rules. Oh and one more thing, even if you only qualify in the final five you’ll still get something as a consolation prize, read the rules carefully.

4. “Design the BMD logo contest” official rules:

Subscriptions are only accepted through a comment on this particular blog entry. Comments will contain a link to your work (I personally suggest imageshack) and optional comments about your contest submission. These comments will only be written in English and are subject of approval so please be patient and only click once. I will not accept any other form of contest submission.

There is a maximum of two pieces of work allowed for each contestant and they should come in separate comments.

Entries in this contest must contain the BMD letters and something that would relate that to the DotA game itself. The rest is optional and I will leave that entirely up to your imagination, as long as it keeps a logo appearance.

This contest ends on March 1st 2008. Any entries after that time will be denied a chance to win. This contest is valid if and only if I get a minimum of 30 (thirty) eligible submissions by the aforementioned date. In any other case the dead line will be extended by another week.

After the submission period ends, I will select the 5 (five) best pieces and then I will post a poll on this blog, therefore the winner will be decided between the five finalists by the readers of this blog within a week of voting. I suggest you keep in touch because I will keep you posted with 1-2 weekly updates and then I will announce the five finalist and post the poll for readers to vote on.

The prize of this contest is ONE of the following items, whichever the winner wishes : Razer DiamondBack 3G (view picture above), Microsoft SideWinder gaming mouse (view picture above), Razer Barracuda gaming headphones (view picture above), Razer Tarantula gaming keyboard (view picture above).

Also, the five finalists will receive a one month gold membership on the GG-Game platform and their website promoting their work (if they have one) will be featured on Ted’s game as a banner for two months.

After the winner is decided, we will establish contact and I hereby declare that I will ship the prize of his choice anywhere in the world also paying for the delivery fee. I will make sure that the winner gets his prize of choice within a month after his work is voted as the best. After that the winner agrees to grant me an interview to post on this website as well as on the BMD website.

The contestants hereby agree to declare that they will not claim property on their work once it’s submitted into this contest.

5. Personal suggestions!

I would say you want to keep in touch if you want to become a contestant for the BMD logo. Best way to do that is to subscribe to this blog in a feedreader or by email (confirmation required). Also feel free to read the rest of my social ramblings and perhaps leave a comment. If you need me to make something clear for you, feel free to leave a comment on this blog entry or contact me by email ( mail at tedsgame dot com). I would strongly advise that you do not try and keep your mouth shut about this contest if you wanna become a submitter, because if I don’t meet the necessary 30 entries I will not validate the contest, so I would prefer if you spread the word and let this competition be as good as it gets.

Good luck and may the best logo win!

Later Edit : Make sure you also read this update!

Pearls of wisdom

Published
by
Ted
on February 9, 2008
in Social Wisdom
. 7 Comments Tags: , .

Inspired by Dave Barry’s 1999 book, Dave Barry Turns 50 (click here to purchase) plus some of my own which you may confidently quote.

You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight-saving time.

People who feel the need to tell you that they have an excellent sense of humor are telling you that they have no sense of humor.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.

A penny saved is worthless.

Never believe that your partner that you got together with as a result of him/her cheating on a significant other won’t do the same to you. They will.

Your friends love you anyway.

Life would be better lived back-wards.

There is absolutely no logical reason in the world for using Internet Explorer. I don’t even think Bill Gates cares very much about it.

Playing World of Warcraft is fine. You probably weren’t going to get laid anyway.

A day of my emo life

Published
by
Ted
on February 8, 2008
in People
. 10 Comments Tags: , , .

Hi, I’m emo and I wanna share a little bit of my misunderstood universe with other people. It’s morning now and my sister’s just coming back from a night out. Drunk. I hate her. She hates me more. I’m troubled and I can’t sleep so I’ll just chew the nail-polish off my fingernails. Two hours later my mom spots me chewing my nail-polish and tells me I should get off my ass and go to school. I hate her. She makes me cry. I need to get ready for school. I’m wearing my tight hat today. It’s too tight. Oh shit! It’s a black sock, oh well, shit happens, I hate this world. I sit down and cry. I get to school, it’s so sad, I need to use the washroom first but I can’t unbuckle my studded belt. This makes me cry, I go get my five emo-friends and we do a crying session. We all hate life. I’m pissing my pants. It makes me feel relieved, but it’s so sad to feel relief that it makes us all cry. I’ve got a class, I’m gonna use it to write my suicide letter, I should use blood, fuck blood, it makes me faint, the main thing is to make it as sad as possible. I read my letter once again. It’s so true and sad, it makes me cry. The other emo-kids tell me I’m true. I hate them. They make me cry. I hope we get together later and do a sad kissing session. I love them, they are so sad and true. It’s lunch time, Steve tells us he’s out of pink nail polish and he’s going into depression, I’m trying to make a move on Julie. She tells me I’m a dirty fag. Yuppy, she likes me. I’m so happy, I wanna cry. Oh well, school’s out, time to get home and listen to some Tokyo Hotel, they’re so true. My sister’s home with her friends. The cover me in blankets and start kicking me. After the first couple hours I finally stop crying. I am so real. I hate my sister. I’m late for my crying session with the other emo kids. I was delayed by a group of balled men hating me for my girl Gap pants. I hate them. I make it just in time for the kissing session. We are so real. I sit down and cry. I’m going home now. My sister spots me and breaks my nose. She hates me for being so real. I’m talking to my mom: “Mom, I’m already 17 now, do you think I can start shaving my legs?”. She hates me. She gives me a butt spanking. I’m tired. I’ll just chew on my pink nail polish and cry myself to sleep.

Exit the game, my Lord?

Published
by
Ted
on February 7, 2008
in Gaming
. 18 Comments Tags: , , , .

As I was down with a very persistent Alberta flu, I’ve rediscovered my first war and resource management strategy game that I’ve played, Lords of the Realm II. This game is in my opinion one of the most underrated of all times, probably the one that got me hooked on PC gaming, featuring superb real time battles with great graphics for 1997 and a lot of game-feel when playing the resource management turn based part of it. I’m not gonna try and write down a professional review, but I will bring up the many points that got me so hooked up, again, to finishing the main campaigns and killing some computer enemies in the skirmish mode.

You’re basically fighting up to 4 AI players, which all have quite varied strategies, going from building huge strong castles to acquiring as many counties as possible in order to expand the available men and resources power. Also, you can interact with these handsome characters in various ways, which can lead to different behaviors. It gets quite funny, trust me. As a bonus, listen to the end game song, the messages received from the other players and make sure you play all battles in real time, it’s a lot of fun and you have a better chance at winning, plus it’s always nice to destroy the enemy’s fields and kill the cows.

All of that being said, I’ve made the install pack available for free download, I’m sure I know a few people who’d like to be reminded of the good old times back in high-school.

Ok, let’s get digging, get the game from here.

Later edit: As far as I can see, this entry gets lots of hits so in order to make it easier for my fellow Lords of the Realm fans to get the game, I added one more download link to speed up things a bit. Enjoy.

LINK HERE.